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Dominant discourse, sadly, goes like this: The pickings are slim; it’s all second rounds and baggage and receding hairlines. But now, my life is rich and varied and independent and fun and full.

Most of us aim, at least, to improve our lives year by year (otherwise, what’s the point?! And by this settled age, life is often in a pretty good spot, or, at least, better and richer than it was in our 20s: great friends, a career with up to 20 years back-end development, enough money to be able to not have to live off lentils and all-you-can-eat-Tuesday buffets, and to head to the pictures once in a while. In my 20s it was pretty easy for someone to add to my life, because it wasn’t fully formed.

A couple of years ago, in the early days of the blog, I would do some personal coaching – mostly for friends, occasionally for the odd client or two.

One of my clients, a good friend of mine, was an especially troubling case.

If you are not hopeless romantic, but are in a relationship with one, you may feel that the relationship is doomed to failure.

I have resorted to online dating which has been sub-par at best, and downright awful at worst.I am simply just too socially retarded to even make friends (I only have 2 close friends now) nonetheless take a crack at dating When I see a woman I like I dont bother because I know she wont like me and if she does I will screw it up within a matter of days.And the woman who did give a nanosecond of a thought to dating me ended up breaking my heart in the end.I thought what I had was standard, that everyone else was just as devout an idealist as me.In fact, hookup culture and online dating were cornered off into the back of my mind, acknowledged only by TV shows, movies and memes I saw purely as entertainment.